Hate to bring it up again but ...

[Bearbonesnorm]

... I saw this and it made me laugh (not an easy task) so I thought I'd share

RAMBLING ON.
My name is Donald Dumbasfuck
I live up in New Mills
I love to roam The Peak District
And clamber up the hills
Despite the coravirus scare
I’ll simply carry on
‘Cause you can’t tell me what to do
I answer to no one.

My name is Stanly Selfishtwat
I live in the big city
I like to walk the countryside
I think it’s really pretty
Despite Boris Johnson’s diktat
I’ll do just as I please
I’ve got a crumpled Kleenex
Up my sleeve if I should sneeze

My name is Shirley Stupidcunt
I’ve rambled all my life
I take my flask and rucksack
And my old Swiss Army knife
I ‘m in the local rambler’s club
And we don’t give a stuff
We’re going to gather as a group
And romp through Bretton Clough.

My name is Sharon Shitforbrains
And as far as I’m concerned
I’m coming for my holiday
A break that is well earned
You can call me irresponsible
And say that it’s not right
But I can’t possibly be contagious
So I’ll be there Friday night.

My name is Phillip Fuckwit
I’m a law unto myself
I plan to take my walking group
And stroll down Cucklett Delf
We’re based down here in London
And we’ve hired a mini bus
We’re coming up to Eyam next week
And no one can stop us.

My name is Brenda Braindead
And despite the global virus
I’ll be coming to The Peaks next week
As I find the views desirous
I know I’m supposed to stay at home
To stop the bug from spreading
But I don’t give a flying feck
So it’s to Derbyshire I’m heading.

My name is Timmy Thickasshit
I’ve always been self-centred
I don’t know why the Peak-land folk
Are angry and demented
Just because Covid-19
Has put the world in danger
You’d think my family holiday
Was some kind of game-changer.

My name is Christine Cretinous
I hope to visit soon
I need to see The Derwent Dams
And Harpur’s Blue Lagoon
I’ll be off to visit Castleton
And swell the heaving ranks
I don’t see why I shouldn’t
But then I’m as thick as two short planks.

My name is Dave Greenan
I live in Tidza Town
And folk like these are going to see us
All put in lockdown
Stay at home—save lives—we’re told
But some folk take no heed
‘Cause they’re selfish and self-centered
Inconsiderate indeed.
Even my dog can understand the the word ‘Stay’!

Copyright ©Dave Greenan 22.3.20.

[Rasta]

I take it you live in the countryside?

Maybe Donald Dumbasfuck lives in a city with no outdoor space. Maybe the virus has cost him his job, wife, house.....

Maybe D D is screaming at the walls. Maybe DD is going to top himself........?

[psling]

Brilliant

And so true. As I'm sure is the case up your way Stu, down here we are inundated with visitors every time there is a 'do not travel' directive. Other direction of course, all we hear around here when Wales shuts its borders is "I'm Gareth I am", "I ride like a twit, me"

Of course, doesn't apply to me....

[Bearbonesnorm]

I take it you live in the countryside?

I do but but I don't see as that makes any difference whatsoever. Tier for Tier, people are under the same restrictions no matter where they live.

Maybe Donald Dumbasfuck lives in a city with no outdoor space. Maybe the virus has cost him his job, wife, house.....

Maybe D D is screaming at the walls. Maybe DD is going to top himself........?

Losing your liberty, job, wife, house can effect anyone no matter where they choose to live. And mental health issues know no boundaries.

... and finally, I'm sure a sense of humour, even one that's a little dark, helps get everyone through the bad times.

[Taylor]

I take it you live in the countryside?

Maybe Donald Dumbasfuck lives in a city with no outdoor space. Maybe the virus has cost him his job, wife, house.....

Maybe D D is screaming at the walls. Maybe DD is going to top himself........?

And helping to infect other people is the right thing to do?

[Pirahna]

I've got a part time job delivering shopping for Tesco. One example of the stupidity of people happened a couple of weeks ago. A woman opened the door to me, she had a bit of a cough. Her husband had a positive covid test, she hadn't been tested and in her mind couldn't possibly have it because she hadn't been tested. One of several fuckwits I've met in similar situations, it's no wonder covid is spreading as rapidly as it is, if you believe the new reports obvs.

[mattpage]

I take it you live in the countryside?
Maybe Donald Dumbasfuck lives in a city with no outdoor space. Maybe the virus has cost him his job, wife, house.....

Name me a city that has no outdoor space...

[ssnowman]

I take it you live in the countryside?
Maybe Donald Dumbasfuck lives in a city with no outdoor space. Maybe the virus has cost him his job, wife, house.....

Name me a city that has no outdoor space...

Manchester. Virtually nothing in the centre!

[Lazarus]

Tier for Tier, people are under the same restrictions no matter where they live.

yes but being stuck to the inner city of London in a high rise flat with no garden may be harder than being stuck in the countryside able to roam about as you please. Which place do you prefer?

Locally we have one part of countryside and its certainly the busiest i have ever seen it[inc xmas day] - hardly surprising as there is nothing else you can do
I have not stopped to ask folk how far they have travelled - as per the other thread- I dont want to be seen as "Covid Police chalenging cyclists or those in cars

Name me a city that has no outdoor space...

What you mean roads, pavements, sky that sort of outside space ?
When was the last time you went for a day trip to a city to just enjoy its open spaces ?

EDIT: Whitworth Park is the only park in machester city centre and its pretty small
When I lived in the town centre you can really see Manchester is just a collection of towns whose borders ceased to exist and they merged
think you can get "Linear parks via the canal and also the Irwell river

[ScotRoutes]

I have no doubt I'm in the advantageous position of having acres of lovely countryside on my doorstep. That could mean my views on travel are skewed. However, I don't think it's wrong of me to complain about folk travelling from higher infection rated areas to here and having them put the minimal care facilities under undue pressure.

Cities have big, local hospitals and lots of ICU. Rural regions have small, distant hospitals and little ICU.

[woodsmith]

Like many ( most?) other people I've been struggling with my mental well being through this pandemic and am gratefull for having a back garden to step into and rural surroundings only ten minutes cycling away. I don't know how I'd have coped living on the tenth floor of an inner city tower block but I know the temptation to break regulations or fit through an imaginary loophole would be great.
For me the willingness to conform in the general population crumbled after the total absense of repercussions for Dominic "I'll drive my car to check I'm not blind" Cummings jolly up to Barnard Castle.

[whitestone]

The problem is how do you square the circle of:

Stay local
exercise
avoid crowds

??

It doesn't help that the "rules" are really just guidelines and so vague and contradictory that it doesn't take much mental gymnastics to justify almost any action (raves of 500+ excepted!).

Some, myself and Cath included, are lucky in that we live in a rural location so getting out is relatively easy, actually really easy - we've a BW and a couple of footpaths that run past the door. But for those who live in towns and cities it's not that simple and TBH if I were in that situation I don't know how I'd cope.

But there's also a distinct lack of thought when people do go out - we'd go for a ride on the tops around Malham and see maybe twenty people in three hours, drop into Malham itself and there's 500 cars, so many that they opened up the showground overflow car park! A couple of miles down the road in Airton and the café is a quarter full and no-one about. That wasn't one day/weekend but pretty typical throughout summer.

There's a difference between doing what's best for your health/well being and being a selfish twit.

[jameso]

For me the willingness to conform in the general population crumbled after the total absense of repercussions for Dominic "I'll drive my car to check I'm not blind" Cummings jolly up to Barnard Castle.

Yep, and they knew it would, and it suits them fine. Tories maybe didn't create the situation but they certainly created the chaos, and now infighting among ourselves suits them fine too.

(edited the rest, I was in ranty mode and it's not needed)

[Bearbonesnorm]

But there's also a distinct lack of thought when people do go out - we'd go for a ride on the tops around Malham and see maybe twenty people in three hours, drop into Malham itself and there's 500 cars, so many that they opened up the showground overflow car park! A couple of miles down the road in Airton and the café is a quarter full and no-one about. That wasn't one day/weekend but pretty typical throughout summer.

I think Derbyshire police reported over 200 cars parked at the top of the Snake Pass yesterday, which is far more than you'd expect on a sunny Bank Holiday. I'm beginning to think that the thing that troubles me most is peoples lack of imagination

Some, myself and Cath included, are lucky in that we live in a rural location

Is it luck Bob or did you choose to live there, knowing that in doing so you'd have very few amenities, local facilities or entertainment opportunities? We all make choices and we all make sacrifices when we do. I didn't buy a raffle ticket to find myself here

[lune ranger]

I suppose the luck is that you are able to choose where you live. I don’t expect many folk are choosing to live in inner city tower blocks with all the amenities and leisure facilities they have ...However, I don’t expect it’s the tower block dwellers that are doing the long distance travel transgressions.
Everywhere is heaving though. Every last bit of woodland, park or green space. There is one copse near me that never had cars in the car park until this year, now they are spilling out onto the lane. I guess it shows how many people are normally on holiday abroad at any given time.

[redefined_cycles]

Personally I think part of 'the rules' is designed to do this exact thing... Cause confusion and infighting between loving and friendly folks (like for example on here). The [add descriptor of Daves choice here] have been doing it for years to knacker countries and (other peoples) economies.

Sorry but thats the only way that can explain how 'the rules' are all over the place.... [deleted rant that went here... didn't swear at our racist PM]...

Some, myself and Cath included, are lucky in that we live in a rural location

Is it luck Bob or did you choose to live there, knowing that in doing so you'd have very few amenities, local facilities or entertainment opportunities? We all make choices and we all make sacrifices when we do. I didn't buy a raffle ticket to find myself here

Well [add a describing word of Daves vocab here] said...

[Bearbonesnorm]

I guess it shows how many people are normally on holiday abroad at any given time.

Or perhaps how many would be wondering around shopping centres or sitting in cafes and pubs?

[lune ranger]

I guess it shows how many people are normally on holiday abroad at any given time.

Or perhaps how many would be wondering around shopping centres or sitting in cafes and pubs?

That as well

[Blue Wheeler]

Anyone can come up with self justification to break the rules, bottom line is that everyone has to do their bit in order to protect themselves and others ......... they haven't which is why we are all paying the price. I've started riding in Puddletown Forest which has some great downhill trails but on every occasion I've visited, there have been large groups of 15-20

[sean_iow]

Not forgetting how many are furloughed? If you're only allowed out to buy essential supplies, get medical help or exercise then once you've done the food shopping what else are you going to do? And you don't want to wander round town as it will be busy so you'll head out into the countryside.

I'm not justifying their actions, but since March the number of people I see out has been higher than the same time on normal years, it's natural they would.

[fatbikephil]

I think people would have greater respect for the restrictions if they had greater (or any) respect for the muppets implementing them. Given how royally all the of the various UK govts have screwed up over this (repeatedly) as well as stuff like yer man going to Barney to see his mother its no surprise that people flaunt the rules. Plus the terrible way they have been delivering information makes me wonder how close we've come to widespread national panic and unrest.

[Bearbonesnorm]

[psling]

It doesn't help that the "rules" are really just guidelines and so vague and contradictory that it doesn't take much mental gymnastics to justify almost any action (raves of 500+ excepted!).

Personally I think part of 'the rules' is designed to do this exact thing... Cause confusion and...

I struggle a bit with this and it's something I hear a lot, especially on news channels and social media.

The rules (some of which are punishable in law if broken so not just guidelines) are pretty straightforward. The confusion is added when every journalist, every reporter, every analyst does just that - try to analyse the rules to their own interpretation / advantage. Taking exercise is not a rule, it's a permitted exception if you live in an area under lockdown and it is allowed locally / from home.
There is no confusion in the rule that prohibits travelling out of area; that is not allowed except under specific conditions (which do not include travelling out of area for exercise) and it is punishable by law.

As with all rules, people will stretch them to the umpteenth degree and bar-room barristers will try to find every little loophole they can to justify stretching the rules. I have seen it in motorsport, I have seen it in cycling events; it's happening all the time whether it's travelling at 85 on the motorway at night or parking on double yellows to just pop in to grab a pork pie. The one major difference this time is that a rule-breaker could potentially be the death of you or those dear to you.

[middleagedmadness]

Well I can safely say all year I’ve done my best to stay within the rules without wrapping myself in cotton wool and I’ve still managed to catch it , but I wouldn’t dream of going to a rural area and spreading what ever I’ve got without knowing it , none of the family would have realised that we had it as we have no symptoms apart from the normal sniffles , no coughs or owt, if the wife didn’t have weekly tests we wouldn’t have known (bar the fucktard who wiped out the transport office at work ) so I totally appreciate people being slightly protective over their village , obviously it’s all playing into the governments hands , they wanted a dna data base and now they have one , they wanted a cashless society and we’re over 3/4’s of the way there .Tin foil hat off now, in the last 9 months apart from work we have left Wolverhampton once when we popped down to Stu’s during the relaxed rules .my wife suffers badly with mental health problems but we still dealt with them in our own confines without feeling the need to go and travel round the country (could have bloody killed her though )

[AndreR]

Broadly speaking people choose to live in cities because they like to enjoy the things a city has to offer and countryside probably isn't their priority. Unfortunately pretty much all that's open at the moment is the countryside so they can't go down the pub and watch football with mates and when they are Netflicked to death and bored out of their brain they've got nowhere else to go. Pity so many of them haven't heard of the countryside code.

I am also a little tired of listening to people blaming the lack of clarity in the guidelines for their decisions and in my opinion is usually an excuse to justify doing what the hell ever they want because you can't be bothered to do what's right. If the government had given clear black and white rulings they would have been labeled as dictators, so wrong again. Managing this is a monumental task on top of the huge task of running the country and there is nobody alive who would have got it right even some of the time. Every decision taken will be wrong to some of the population, dealing with something this big will result in missed detail and occasional contradictions, nobody but nobody will get it all right ever. And just when you think you've got a grip on it, oh look the situation just changed so lets start again and again. A little bit of understanding and support for the people tackling the task would not go amiss. I suspect they might be spending some time screaming at the walls and wondering why they bothered to try in the first place.

The idea that anyone currently in government has the time to run a government, manage the Covid situation and mastermind a plot to sow confusion and dissention at the same time would put them right up there with James Bond and they'd probably have a cat! The idea that If Dominic Cummings is allowed to flout the rules then so can everybody else is wrong, why would a decent person lower themselves to his standards?

I'll put the soap box away now